Austin has no shortage of leaders who are respected, and even revered. But it’s safe to say that, among them all, Cookie Ruiz is our most beloved.

As executive director of Ballet Austin for 13 years, Cookie Ruiz has successfully led the company, alongside artistic director Stephen Mills,  onto the national and international arts scene. Even more than that, her vision, savvy, and soul  have touched almost every part of the Austin community. She has led us in ways both formal and informal–by serving large institutions and by mentoring young women one at a time.

Her honors include Austin Business Journal’s “Profiles in Power” award, Austin Community Foundation’s Beverly S. Sheffield Award/Excellence as Nonprofit Executive, The American Red Cross “Clara Barton Medal of Honor,” Volunteer of the Year for the Austin Independent School District, and the Lone Star Girl Scout Council “Women of Distinction” Award. A former president of The Junior League of Austin, she provided research and development for the nationally recognized Junior League of Austin Hispanic Mother/Daughter Program (Con Mi Madre). A graduate of Leadership Austin, Ms. Ruiz co-founded the diversity/principle-based curriculum for the Teen Leadership Austin program and served as a member of the Leadership Austin Board of Directors.

Much to Austin’s delight, Cookie has signed a ten-year contract with Ballet Austin through 2021. In the meantime, here’s what Cookie shared with Women Advance about becoming a leader:

Tell us about your career trajectory.

As first a daughter, and then a wife, of an Air Force officer, I completed 17 PCS (permanent change of station) moves by the age of 34. So there wasn’t a lot of opportunity for a “trajectory” to my professional life. But every experience I accumulated through world travel, life experience, for-profit and non-profit work over the years is fully utilized in my role as executive director of Ballet Austin.

Do you have a woman leader role model?

I was tremendously impacted by the appointment of Sandra Day O’Connor as the first female Supreme Court Justice–not because of political views, but because I saw that a woman could finally be chosen to sit on the Supreme Court. This became an important filter through which I began to consider new possibilities. The world grew a little in my eyes. Any time a child can see “someone like me” succeed, it opens up the possibilities in that life. Justice O’Connor did this for me.

What do you think are the top three habits of a good leader?

1.  Articulating a clear vision to board and team members
2.  Surrounding yourself with amazing people passionate about attaining the vision
3.  Excellent hearing . . . and the willingness to use it

Could you share a story about one of your hardest lessons-learned as a leader?

There is a terminal disease that can easily infect leaders, particularly in the nonprofit sector. While infected, you see yourself much like the Dutch boy in the children’s story who physically prevents his village from drowning by plugging up holes in the dam with his fingers and toes. When you have your nose against that dam, you believe that, if you take vacation, or do not stay up to answer each and every email, or do not attend every meeting and weigh in on every issue, the village will be swept away. I’ve been there, and through a series of circumstances I was forced to step away from the dam. I was shocked to discover that the village survived! In fact, there were so many capable hands holding up that wall that I realized: not only can my team members take on greater responsibility, but my skills are actually needed elsewhere. Note to self: You’re not holding up the world. Ever.

What advice would you give to a young woman who wants to become a non-profit leader?

NPO management is an exceptional choice for young women seeking a career that will always be satisfying, of which they will always be proud. It starts with the belief in the Power of One: one person to change the world. I encourage my mentees to consider the ways in which they seek to make the world a better place and to follow that passion. One of the great secrets in life is to find a way to be compensated to do something you truly love. Many women want to know that the time they commit to their professional lives–spent away from their families/friends–is meaningful. That in some way it will improve life/community.

Any final thoughts about leadership?

I have learned my most profound lessons about leadership through working with teenagers. What I learned is that there is an amazing type of leader who invariably emerges from the CENTER of the pack. This isn’t the charismatic kid out front. This is the kid who just IS. She has a clear sense of her personal assets/talents/values as well as her challenges. She leads by living, and slowly the other kids are drawn to this positive force that doesn’t ask for attention or soak up all the energy. It’s almost as if the crowd parts and the group waits as this teenager reluctantly moves forward. The most amazing leader is the one leading by example.

A strategic consultant based in Singapore, Horan wrote her book in order “to provide a practical, common-sense approach to building the political savvy skills necessary for leadership, for career management, for selling ideas and for navigating organizational change.” She successfully removes the stigma from power, explaining why it’s important to even the least “political” among us: “A better way … to consider power [is] in terms of decision making, organizational effectiveness and how things get done.” (original italics)

That’s the bottom line: if you want to get things done efficiently and effectively (or at all), you need to plug into the power grid of your workplace.

“And how,” I can hear you asking, “do I do that?”

Here is Horan’s advice: Start by figuring out where the real power in your organization lies. Look past the organizational chart and ask yourself:

1. Who goes to lunch with whom?
2. Who interrupts whom at meetings?
3. Who controls or has access to key people and private information?
4. Who controls resources (budgets, money, people)?

Answer these questions, and you’ll begin to groove a fresh mindset. How does influence flow? Where are you and your team in relation to that flow? How can you move yourself and your team closer to that flow, even enter and shape it?

“Being connected to power and influence networks,”  Horan reminds us, “is one of the most important steps you can take to build political awareness skills and your career.”

Heather kindly agreed to kick off our Women Advance leadership interview series. (If you want to suggest a successful woman leader to be featured, email me your idea.) Here’s what Heather had to say:

What are your main responsibilities as publisher of the Austin Business Journal?

My role is to lead my staff to success, whether that be in audience development, marketing strategy, advertising revenue, creative design, business integrity, or editorial vision. And there’s a community leadership component, as well.

Do you have a woman leader role model? What makes her your role model?

My mentor and role model is my first female boss – Debbie Joseph, founder and president of Destination Marketing Hawaii. Debbie influenced the way I do everything, from organizing my to-do list and calendar to how I conduct meetings.  She also showed me that your clients can become your friends and your friends your clients.  It’s okay to blur the line between work and play, plus it makes life a lot more fun!

What do you think are the top 3 habits of a good leader?

1. Respect for your customers and your employees. I wouldn’t ask them to do anything I wouldn’t do.
2. Ability to make decisions and execute or implement them.
3. Open and honest communication!!!

Could you share a story about one of your hardest lessons-learned as a leader?

You cannot take for granted how much you affect someone.  As Kip Tindell, CEO of The Container Store, said at ABJ’s Face2Face event last month, “don’t underestimate your wake.”

What advice would you give to a young woman who aspires to become a business leader?

It takes time and effort.  Join professional organizations, find a mentor, don’t be afraid to ask questions, and be open to learning.

At the Power Summit held by the UT Center for Women in Law, Mary Cranston shared her own personal tool for people-mapping. It’s so simple, so blunt, so instrumental, that some might call it crass. I call it brilliant.

Cranston was the very first female chair of a big national law firm–an amazing achievement, considering the dismal record of big law for retaining and advancing women. Today Cranston is Senior Partner and Chair Emeritus of Pillsbury Winthrop Shaw Pittman LLP and Chair of the American Bar Association Commission on Women in the Profession.

With her roadmap completed, she began a systematic lunch program, beginning with weak tie-low power contacts, where she rehearsed her “elevator speech,” and worked her way up to lunching with the strong tie-high power sponsors. Always, she aimed to build reciprocal relationships with mutual exchange.

Over time, Cranston assures, you’ll ride that network momentum all the way to your goal. And that’s power.

photo by sidewalk flying

“It’s so easy to get distracted by what other people think, do, or say. But they don’t live your life. You need to know what you want and who you are, and you have to convey it to others quickly so that you shine at first impression.” – Christopher Bailey, chief creative officer, Burberry

At a recent executive breakfast that I facilitated, I began by asking everyone to share the name of a woman they considered a model of executive presence. The answers ranged from Mother Teresa to Margaret Thatcher. Believe it or not, that combination makes perfect sense, despite the radical differences between the two women, because each one’s executive presence was rooted in the unshakeable force of her belief. I call it her “aura of authority.”

Do you possess a force of belief that immediately expresses, without words, the depth of your conviction, commitment, and competence? In other words: do you know what drives you? And how deeply do you remain connected with that drive?

The essence of executive presence is that inner force. Call it belief, call it confidence, call it charisma. It may be tough to nail down, but it’s absolutely visible, even palpable. Kind of like porn. You know it when you see it, but it’s hard for even the Supreme Court to define.

So how do you cultivate executive presence? And how do you cultivate executive presence as a woman in a male-defined culture? Here’s a summary of the ingredients we identified together at the breakfast:

1.            Confidence

What does confidence look like? It’s a physical sense of ease. No tightness or tension spots. It’s clear breathing inside/out, an easy flow throughout the musculature. A bodily sense of connection that actually “swings” (like President Obama bounding off that helicopter on the White House lawn).

2.            Calm

One executive invoked her aunt as an exemplar of executive presence, because “she was always calm.” Makes sense, doesn’t it? Do you want to follow the one who gets flustered, or the one who remains the calm eye at the center of the storm? Whom would you prefer to follow into battle? As one advisor says to the aspiring prime minister in “The Iron Lady,” “you must learn to calm down to be taken seriously.” Practice radiating energy that is soothing and whole, not fragmented and anxious.

3.            Power

How powerful is your posture? Executive presence is a complex phenomenon, and there is no “silver bullet.” But if I had to offer only one piece of advice, I’d say: improve your posture. Because posture is how we tell the world how comfortable we are in our skins, and how intentionally we project ourselves out into the world. Posture consists of two elements: first, the grounded power in your pelvis that connects you to the earth, and second, the graceful lift of the chest. Visualize the silhouette of modern dancer Isadora Duncan. Her mantra was: strength at the core, lightness at the edges.

4.            Attention

Where is your focus when you’re with other people? In the last meeting? In the next one? On your electronic-device-of-choice? Be the one who’s always present and attentive and mindful of people as individuals. It’s not just respectful, it’s seductive.

5.            Space

How much space do you claim, literally and metaphorically? Do you narrow your body (cross your legs, your arms) so you take up as little space as possible? Or are you expansive, with an open chest and arms akimbo? Do you sit in the back row, or up front? Maybe even next to the alpha? Your choices tell the world where you position yourself. And if you don’t position yourself front and center, why should anyone else?

6.            Strategy

In a male-defined culture, women face a double bind. We’re exhorted to step up, but we’re penalized if we’re “too” authoritative, or capable, or assertive . . . In academic-speak, women are expected to behave in a traditionally feminine “communal” way and often get zapped if they act in too much of a traditionally male “agentic” way. The only way out of this dilemma is to master both sets of tactics and deploy them strategically at every turn. Depending upon your immediate and corporate/client culture, know when to smile, and when to hold your smile.

7.            Style

There is no one way that a leader looks. “Toughness,” Cal. Senator Dianne Feinstein has observed, “doesn’t have to come in a pinstripe suit.” At the end of the day, the executive, or the leader, is the one who knows herself so well, so unflinchingly, that she understands how to present herself to best and immediate effect. For me, for example, there is nothing empowering about teetering in pumps that only serve to emphasize my derriere and legs. I’m all about the power of being smart and clear and grounded. Give me a sturdy kitten heel and I’m ready to take on the world.

“Hi Ann,

Just a quick note to let you know I had my review. It went very, very well. I am happy. My salary has been increased 11%, which is substantially above the stated 7.5% cap for the firm.

I spent a good amount of time preparing for the conversation, thanks to our talk together. You helped me get clear about what my goal was going into the meeting. I had a little speech written out for myself and rehearsed it well. I was ready with all sorts of numbers and facts on the firm’s growth and how I didn’t get to participate in it last year, although I had strongly contributed to it. I didn’t find real comparative numbers, but I did have relative internal numbers that I could have used, if necessary.

Also, importantly, I managed to have a relaxed and interesting conversation with my CEO. I was worried I was going to let myself babble uncontrollably. Instead, I forced myself to stop at the end of each point.

I came out of the review with much more confidence in my career strategy. We explicitly talked about the fact that I am involved in so many different initiatives and whether this might be perceived as a lack of focus. He reassured me that this “portfolio attitude” was actually the right way to go at this time of high uncertainty and volatility.

Tonight is the office party, and I am now ready to really celebrate. Thank you again so much!”

The only reason I went for the blunt tool was that I knew Rina to be a really smart cookie and a quick study, to boot. She doesn’t get stuck in ego, and she is serious about her career. Let me break down the tools and techniques she used to get that 11% pay bump, so you can go get your own raise! (For your own step-by-step guided process, check out “How To Get A Raise.” )

1.         Walk into the performance review with a clear goal.

As with any meeting, you share responsibility for driving the outcomes. What do you want to get out of the review? Literally, what do you want to walk away with? It might be a raise, which was Rina’s goal. It might be a cross-functional training opportunity. It might be P&L experience. It might be leadership development. Don’t squander this rare opportunity to focus your boss on how you see your performance, your value, and your future. Then suggest how she can help make it happen.

2.         Document your case.

A performance review is no place for feelings (i.e., what I “deserve”). Feelings, however strong, do not argue for the quality and merit of your performance. Facts and figures, on the other hand, do make for a convincing argument. It was a challenge for Rina to find industry numbers, but she came up with internal figures she could use. Research has shown that, in workplaces where career advancement is left to subjective criteria, women are consistently disadvantaged. So make your language as objective as possible. Organize all the information you have been gathering throughout the year (you’ve been doing that, right?) to demonstrate your accomplishments in terms of what is important to your organization. Not what you think is important, but what you know is valued and rewarded by your organization. You’ll want to provide documentation in two categories, depending on your goal: 1) your contributions to the company, and 2) comparable salaries.

3.         Rehearse.

A performance review is an inherently nerve-wracking situation, even for the seasoned exec. But what the seasoned exec knows is how to look cool, calm, and collected. That comes from practice. Rina knew from experience that her boss is quiet and awkward in one-on-ones, so she practiced how to deal with what was, for her, an uncomfortable interpersonal situation. So she did two things to prepare. First, she rehearsed saying out loud what she wanted. It gets easier and more natural every time you say it out loud, even if it’s to the mirror when you’re brushing. Second, she trained herself to restrain from rushing in to fill up the blank spots in the conversation. Make your point, take a breath, and give your boss the time and space to respond. (BTW, speaking strategically is a great power tool in any situation.)

4.         Ask for feedback.

Women tend not to get plentiful or comprehensive feedback. And that’s a significant impediment to advancement. The performance review is your ideal venue to get your boss’s feedback in as much specificity as depth as you desire. If the feedback is too vague to be useful, then ask clarifying questions. Ask for examples. Ask for more. One exec I know sat down with her boss and asked him point-blank to do a side-by-side comparison between her and each of her colleagues! She was not going to get left behind because she didn’t know where she stood in the pack. For Rina, getting explicit feedback on her “portfolio attitude” permits her to stop second-guessing its strategic value.

Give it a try. Turn your annual performance review from a necessary evil into a secret weapon. You have nothing to lose, and 11% to gain—at least, Rina did.

PS — I used Rina’s success to design a rockin’ weekly workout e-course just for you: “How To Get A Raise.”

Michele Walker-Moak has a great solution! “If you’re someone whose current job is too defined and doesn’t allow for growth opportunities or movement across departments, nonprofit board membership may be the right answer for you.”

As manager of Community Affairs for Applied Materials, Michele coordinates the tech company’s community activities in Austin. “Among other duties, I manage our volunteer activities and work closely with our employees to encourage community engagement at all levels, including board membership.”

Because non-profit boards are operating well below capacity in central Texas, an aspiring leader can step in and make an impact. And it’s mutually-rewarding. “Not only are you serving your community and supporting a cause that you are passionate about, but board membership often allows you opportunities not afforded in many professional environments.”

Serving on a board, Michele explains, gives you the opportunity to:

• gain decision-making experience at a strategic level
• become an influencer in your community
• broaden your point-of-view by working with colleagues outside your industry
• expand your network
• boost your resume
• lead diverse teams
• manage change

Even more, you can broaden and strengthen your functional skill sets, including:

• financial management
• project management
• strategic planning
• developing fundraising and revenue streams
• growth planning
• human resource management

Serving as a board member of Reading Is Fundamental and as board president for BookSpring, Michele learned how to work collaboratively, organize diverse groups around a cause, and manage a budget–all skill sets that improved her performance at Applied Materials.

So, how do you go about joining a board? Michele suggests that you start by identifying an area you’re passionate about. “There are so many options! Your interest can vary from ‘protecting animal habitats’ to ‘discouraging bullying in schools.’”

Once you define your interest, she advises, do an internet search for compatible organizations in your area. In Central Austin, try: Greenlights for Nonprofit Success.

“Reach out to the organizations and meet with their board members and executive directors. Boards come in many shapes and sizes, so it’s very important to find the right fit. Some boards operate as a ‘working’ board, and some are more of a ‘governing’ board. Know what works for you. Also, be clear about specific board expectations and responsibilities. Ask to see a board handbook.”

In preparation for taping my audiobook, I undertook voice coaching with Pamela Christian PhD, a former colleague of mine from the University of Texas at Austin. I was stunned by how much I didn’t know about my own voice and how simple it was to enhance my speech style.

Besides teaching at UT, Pam is a voice coach/consultant and director of Clarity of Speech International, her consulting firm. Pam is also a fellow feminist, sensitive to the issues that face women in the workplace, so I asked her to share some of her insights into the gender of voice.

Why do women and men sound different when they speak?

First, there’s the effect of anatomy on pitch and vibration. Because a man’s larynx (the “voice box” situated in the middle of the neck) is larger than that of a woman’s, his vocal cords are longer. With a larger larynx and longer vocal cords, a man has a deeper, more resonant speaking voice. With shorter and more taut vocal cords, women have a higher pitch and less resonance.

Second, there’s the impact of cultural conditioning. As girls and then women, we learn gender behaviors and concepts of femininity that include speech style. These qualities, once identified and understood, can be reconstructed just as effectively as they were constructed: softness or breathiness (low volume and support), high variability (a sing-song quality), and general politeness/compliance both in tone and content.

How does voice contribute to how seriously we take a woman?

This question most often relates to how women compare to men in law, business, politics, etc. where vocal performance is part of the job and speech style is key. Men tend to be taken more seriously from the get-go.

Why? If we look at primates, the deeper the voice, the larger the animal; and the larger the animal, the more power and pull. Most high-level professionals are required to demonstrate authority and the ability to push against obstacles to get the job done. Because the typical, untrained woman’s voice has more variability, and the tone is often higher and thinner, there could easily be the perception that she “carries less weight.”

Consider, for example, the boardroom meeting where voices and ideas are debated and accepted or rejected. The louder, more forceful voices will be heard above the rest, whether the arguments are the best ones or not. It’s a matter of the survival of the fittest.  Our culture still enforces a social contract that privileges force over function, and this translates into the voice.

That said, power in the workplace is being re-defined, simply because there are more high-achieving women in the C-suite. Speech styles and expectations are changing. We have many more examples of what power can look and sound like for women.

What are the main principles behind how powerfully (or not) women use their voices?

Here are three ways that women can connect with their most powerful voice:

First, embrace your own voice. This is where it all starts. This is where the power lies. Your voice may not be perfect, but it’s the voice you have and it can be developed. A powerful voice is your fully realized voice, not to be confused with an imitation of “loud and strong.”

Second, cultivate awareness.  Observe how women today present themselves in politics, film, radio, in person, etc.  There is such a range of possibilities, not just one static idea of how the voice can be used effectively. Become more aware of your own voice and assess what power means to you. Here’s an exercise: Record your voice reading and in conversation. Listen back for what you like and what you want to improve. Set a few personal goals and keep it simple. Get feedback from a friend. Make note of your improvements. Integration over time (a little bit each day) will win the day.

Third, keep practicing. Every day presents us with opportunities to speak with personal distinction. Giving a group report can be a voice practice session. Pitching an idea can be a performance event. If you lead with the intention to improve your vocal presence, and you utilize everyday opportunities for voice practice, you will continually reinforce your most powerful vocal identity.

What are your top three tips for speaking with more presence & power?

1.  Use your breath efficiently to support the sound of your voice
2.  Enunciate your words with conviction
3.  Project your voice “forward and out”

photo by Fortune Live Media

Dianne H. Eldridge, one such McCombs MBA student, actually a recent grad from Houston, sent me the “day in the life” diary that she wrote for the program’s new student survival guide. If you’re considering an MBA program, here’s a taste of what it’s like. (Makes me wistful for my own grad school days–some of my life’s best.)

“A Day in the Life of a Working Professional MBA”
by Dianne H. Eldridge, MBA ’11, UT Houston

6:00 am

Radio Alarm off to NPR news while I continue to lie in bed with iPhone in hand.  Check 1) work email – in case any urgent issues from overseas offices arrived overnight; 2) personal email; 3) Facebook

6:15 am

Get every body else up in the house including 1 husband, 2 children, and 1 yellow Labrador

6:45 am

Every body is showered, dressed, brushed, packed with snack and out the door – due to multiple incidences of missing sneakers during morning dash, all people under 18 have a back up pair at the door to avoid missing school bus scenarios.

7:00 am

Sit down in my home office and start working – today is class weekend Friday.  I normally work from home in the morning and pack up to go to school in the afternoon.

7:30am

Walk over to my 4th grade daughter’s school for a scheduled parent-teacher conference- she’s doing great according to the teachers!  Woohoo!!

8:15am

Back to home office and prepare for a quick conference call with Asia office – we are wrapping up some pricing/term issues with a project bid. The bid is due next Tuesday.

9:00 am

Call Houston office to check on my team.  One of my engineers is getting married and today is his last day in the office as a bachelor.  Wish him best of luck and assure him as long as he let his lady to be the boss, life would be grand.

10:00 am

No burning issues at work; Time to prepare for Strategy class from Professor Fredrickson and review the cases we’d be discussing in class today – he cold calls us to start the case and ask for our recommendations.  I have not been called so far so it could happen any time now! The two cases we will be discussing today are “Southwest Airline” and “Cleveland Twist Drill”

12:30 pm

Walk over to daughter’s elementary school and perform my volunteer duty as one of the science lab leaders.  Kids love to have their parents in the lab!

2:00 pm

Back home and packed up for school and overnight bag.  Most of my classmates chose the residential component school offered on Friday nights.  We all stay at Hotel ZaZa and these fun Friday nights are honestly one of the highlights of my MBA life!

3:00 pm

Arrive at UT Houston campus and I have about an hour to have some snack and catch up with classmates before class starts at 4pm. This is the best time for news. Today’s highlights are a new engagement, an expecting farther found out he’s having a boy, and updates on 2nd or 3rd rounds of interviews through On Campus Recruiting!

4:00 pm

Strategy class!! Why is Southwest so successful? Is it the right move for Cleveland Drill’s new CEO to fire 80% of the old management within 7 months on the job? Apparently, I am one of the 3 people in the whole class agree with the CEO’s move!

8:00 pm

Fun class and it goes by fast!  While most people attending the briefing on MBA+ program on communication coaching, I go to the very first McCombs Admissions Committee (MAC) training.  Yes, I have volunteered to be in this committee in hope to offer assistance to new applicants and new students.  Shannon ran a tight ship and I am sure this will be a valuable experience and opportunity to meet people!

8:40 pm

MAC training is over and I caught the last part of the communication program briefing.

9: 00pm

Quick drive from campus to the hotel.  Checked in and changed into jeans.  Called home to check in with family and say good night to the kids.

9:25 pm

Meet up with friends at the lobby.   Both class of  11′ and 12′ are having a joint event tonight at Bodegas Taco Shop down the street from the hotel

9:40 pm

Friends, laughter, margaritas, chips and salsa… need I say more? Some pictures with questionable poses are taken and will be posted on Facebook for all to laugh about in the next few days.

Unspecified hour

Bed time! Tomorrow, we are facing 4 hours of Marketing with Professor Williams and 4 hours of Finance with Professor Almazan. Not looking forward to having Finance in the last 4 afternoon hours of the weekend!  All in all, a very fun productive day for a full-time-student-full-time-working-mom-of-two!!

photo by SCA Svenska Cellulosa Aktiebolaget